dont-compare-yourself
Musings

Please Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but please stop comparing yourself to others.

This is such a hard thing for most of us to do. But we have to – it really doesn’t matter what accolades or progress others are making. You don’t have the exact same experiences as them, nor do they have the same as you. You will always be behind or ahead of others, metaphorically speaking. But that doesn’t mean your life experience is better or worse, it’s just different.

So, please, stop comparing yourself to others.

This can be such a hard habit to break, especially when you’re discouraged about your own progress. I don’t know why, but this can be so ingrained in all of us. Social media, work, even our families, can inadvertently make us feel less than – but it’s our choice to feel that way when we’re comparing ourselves to someone else’s life, accomplishments, experiences, or possessions.

So, what do you do when you feel yourself comparing yourself to others?

First, put away social media. Remember that more often than not, what you’re looking at is the best possible version of that person, represented publicly on their social media feed. I like to say that social media isn’t real life, because it doesn’t tell the entire story. It doesn’t reveal the hours of work that went into creating a single post, or the work that went into the career or life of the person you’re looking at online. Posts also can make it look like someone has a killer life, and often times, that isn’t real.

Second, make a list of all the great things in your own life. Friends, relationships, and real, tangible aspects of your life that make you happy should make the list. Do you love sitting outside and having coffee in the morning? Put it on the list! Did you kill it at work this week? Write it down. Once you see all the great things in your world, it will give you some perspective.

Third, talk to a friend or family member. Your support system probably sees you in a different way than how you’re seeing yourself and can help shed a little perspective on what you’re feeling. Sometimes just talking to someone who cares about us is enough to make us feel better. We all need a shoulder to cry on or a friendly face to talk to from time to time.

It’s easy to look at others and think things such as “how did they get that award?” or “Why am I not receiving as much attention?” but those snippets of their lives don’t tell the whole story. They never do. While it’s sometimes SO hard to do, the best course is to stay in your lane, don’t compare yourself to others, and work. Your time will come, and when it does, it will be oh so sweet.

Photo by Amanda Jones on Unsplash

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